I Want, I Don’t Want – Rhoads Life Coaching, LLC

Sometimes we find ourselves stuck between pulling something we want towards us while also pushing it away. If we slow down and listen we can almost hear the two internal voices arguing – “I Want” and “I Don’t Want”.

The image comes to mind of one had pulling the thing I want towards me, while the other hand is pushing it away at the same time. Suddenly I am stuck! If I let go with the first hand I will lose the thing I want. Letting go with the second hand, I will definitely get it (and that might be bad)!

Where does this happen for you?

Deciding whether to stay at your job?

Whether to go back to school?

Asking someone out?

We have trouble resolving the internal conflict when we can’t or don’t know how to change our hold in order to choose something else to resole the conflict. So how to get unstuck?

Bringing a third perspective is the simplest place to start. The two versions of yourself (the I Want and the I Don’t Want) have a reason for being there. The third version of yourself can help by observing the conflict from a place of not being stuck. Have the third version assess the situation. Ask the two in conflict what they are trying to achieve. Is it possible to negotiate a solution where both are willing to change their grip to help the other out?

With practice and patience this negotiation and collaboration can help in resolving future internal conflicts! – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

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