I find it is a useful coaching tool to pause to verify growth and development. This reflecting back allows us to affirm for ourselves life does continue to change.
Our lives move so fast, we frequently create for ourselves a narrative that nothing changes. Sometimes we are able to convince ourselves we are repeating events and growth is not happening, or even worse, that nothing good has happened recently.
To combat these mindsets it is important to verify change is happening and in order to do that we need a relative point of measurement to the current state. Reflecting back allows us to find that relative point.
Thinking of the different domains of your life, where were you emotionally six months ago? How have your relationships changed over the last decade? Have you taken care of your physical health in the last year? How has your spiritual view of the world changed recently? How has your career or finances developed in the last three years?
While these are all broad questions, the specific and detailed examples help in reflecting back. What was the best book or movie you encountered this year? Who did you reconnect with this year? Were you able to take a trip to see a new place recently? How has your family changed this year?
My request is to take some time in the next week and practice reflecting back. Not by holding onto and obsessing about the past. Not by making a top ten list. But reflect on where your path has led you over the last year and the last decade. It offers clues as to where you are headed in the future! – www.rhoadscoaching.com
Sometimes the most obvious things can be the most profound. I have been laughing and shaking my head this week at how much it struck me to hear the statement, “For innovation to happen, change has to be something different”.
Let that sink in for a minute. It is painfully obvious, right? Duh! Of COURSE something has to be different. Having worked with a lot of people around growth and development (the foundations of my coaching practice), I can tell you that most of us say we want change, but we don’t really hear or believe it. Don’t believe me? Put your wallet in your other pocket for a day. Or carry your purse on your opposite shoulder. See how different your day is!
Rarely do I meet someone who doesn’t want their life to improve. For things to get better. But if nothing is different about how they live, then nothing will change.
We have to create a space to allow change to happen. By definition we have to do something different to create the space for our business, clients, employees, family, friends, and children to develop and grow. If that different space isn’t created, nothing will change.
So where in your life are you preventing something different from happening (both intentionally and unintentionally)? Where do you want things to be better, but there is no space to create something new? How will you see things differently and look for different spaces to create in order to change? – www.rhoadscoaching.com
So what IS coaching? More importantly, why do you care?
I find it interesting that we investing so much time, energy, and money into coaching athletes. Almost as soon as our children can walk, all the way up to the highest levels of professionals, we trust in coaches to develop athletes in every possible way. Once our athletic careers are over and we settle on a profession, for most of us coaching stops. Why is that? Why would athletics need more focused development that other areas of life?
A coach is someone who helps someone develop themselves (whether a team or individual). Coaching is different from teaching, therapy, consulting and advising and it can be applied to nearly every aspect of life. These other roles usually tell someone what to do or how to do it. A coach is looking for helping the individual develop themselves. If a coach is doing their job well, the individual is finding their own answers. Remember a coach doesn’t go out of the field to play!
So why do you care? Why do you need a coach? If it was valuable to develop your batting, throwing, tackling, foul shots, serves, etc., why is it not valuable to develop your communication, conflict resolution, emotional intelligence, relational intelligence, values, goals, and vision? EVERY aspect of our lives can be developed. Coaching becomes one method of intentionally developing specific pathways.
What aspects of your personal and professional life could benefit from development? How could coaching accelerate your growth? What’s holding you back? – www.rhoadscoaching.com
Sometimes clearing a space to work or think is just as important as knowing what to work on. How do you clear an internal space for yourself?
Just like my grandfather’s workbench. Or your desk at home. The kitchen counter top. Or the treadmill that has been used as a clothes rack, our internal worlds can be cluttered. Sometimes the clutter and chaos inside our thoughts and emotions prevent us from even deciding what to work on next.
I find it useful for, me and my clients, to practice clearing a space internally before moving into decisions or emotions. This becomes almost a meditation of sorts. Pick an image of what organizes things for your internally (a peg board, or cubbies on a wall, hooks or hangers). Then slow everything down inside. One at a time put each topic, thought, feeling, or even person in one of those places until there is enough space. From here, it is then possible to decide what is urgent and important to work on next! – www.rhoadscoaching.com