Archetypes (Our Higher Selves) – Rhoads Life Coaching

Have you ever considered that there are higher forms of yourself? In addition to all the other roles you play, there are aspects of who you are that are common to all humans. Carl Jung calls these aspects Archetypes. They can be developed and used just like any other facet of who you are!

Just like the different layers of rock at the Trammel Fossil Park, there are layers to your personality. The upper layers are more sophisticated and have more ability and potential than the lower layers. How do we know? Because these same common roles show up in different cultures all over the world. Our stories, movies, TV shows, plays, and mythology are indicators of how everyday people have these archetypes in them. It isn’t an accident that Dorothy needs four different characters to return home from Oz. Nor is it an accident that Frodo can’t get all the way to Mordor without the Fellowship of the Ring.

Why do you care? If you can accept that archetypes are an aspect of each of us, becoming aware of how they appear inside of you, then you can begin to develop each of them in your daily life. You have the ability to empower your warrior to solve a difficult task done more effectively. What if your wizard or sorcerous was able to find a creative new solution to a problem that prevented your warrior from having to go out and fight again? How you appear if your inner king or queen accepted their own worthiness in asking for what is needed?

These higher forms create potential. By calling down, connecting to, and developing these archetypes in ourselves, we have the ability to change how we appear in the world in very powerful and meaningful ways. – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Creating Meaning – Rhoads Life Coaching

One of the most significant things that separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom is how we are creating meaning in life. Other animals are able to learn and adapt, but (as far as we can tell) they are unable to step outside themselves and make sense of the world. We spend a lot of time wanting and needing meaning in our lives. Do you think about how you create meaning though?

We can create meaning out of almost anything. Your child’s security blanket, a lucky penny we pick up on the sidewalk, weddings, funerals, graduations, etc. The things we find meaningful are unique to each of us through our vision, values, priorities and goals. We create meaning, though, by stepping back from ourselves, observing, and making sense of what we see.

It is critical for our personal and professional development to be able to see the context of how we fit into the world around us. By making sense of this context, by knowing why, we are able to see our own value and purpose. THIS is meaningful.

If meaning can be created, it can also be developed – just like any other skill. Where do you find meaning in your life? Where is meaning missing? What do you need to do to step back and observe yourself as you go through your day? To make sense of how your daily life fits into the bigger picture? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

How Bad Do You Want It? – Rhoads Life Coaching

I had to take my own advice today in filming at Rentschler Forest – twice the camera blew over (and I needed a heavier jacket)! Ok, Rhoads… How bad do you want it?

I’m a big fan (nerd) of reading historical markers. This one at Rentschler Park is for the 20 mile segment of the Miami & Erie Canal dug in the early 1820’s. BY HAND! In connecting Cincinnati to Toledo, not only was there a grand vision of connecting the west side of Ohio, there was also the practical application of having to go dig (with shovels) mile after mile of canal. A large group of people decided it was worth the effort to expend the time and energy to make that vision a reality.

Frequently in coaching we run up against obstacles as soon as a goal or vision is set. In assessing whether to move forward, my question to clients is “How Bad Do You Want It?”. The value of achieving the goal has to outweigh the effort involved to scale each hurdle. Remembering that value is what keeps us moving toward our goals, even if it is at a slow, measured pace.

What goals are you reaching toward? What obstacles are getting in the way? How do you remind yourself that what you are reaching for is valuable? How bad do you want it? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Knowing vs. Understanding – Rhoads Life Coaching

Do you keep track of how to define knowing vs. understanding? When we teach young children to brush their teeth, we begin by teaching them HOW to brush. It takes a while to learn to know how to brush! The understanding of WHY to brush their teeth is different. It isn’t a requirement to understand why brushing is important in order to complete the task. As they get older (and probably after a couple of cavities) the understanding of why to brush enables their brushing to develop to a higher level of skill and effectiveness.

We have all run into the fast food server, or the unmotivated co-worker, who clearly knows how to do their job, but does not have a developed understanding of why their role is important to the business, community, or even themselves. In order to grow personally and professionally, it helps to identify the areas where knowing must change into understanding. This can apply to any aspect of life and creates a sense of purpose and meaning in our daily tasks.

Where does this happen for you? What aspects of your life are you going through the motions because you know how to do something, but have not paid attention to or developed your understanding of why. A skill or task at work? How to navigate a conflict with a family member? Why you have such a difficult time overcoming a personal obstacle? Where is there an opportunity to develop your knowing vs. understanding? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

What Are You Willing To Give Up? – Rhoads Life Coaching

Frequently we get so focused on what we must gain in order to change we forget we must also be willing to give something up. What must you let go of in order to grow?

When coaching, it is sometimes difficult to miss the armloads of preconceived notions, belief systems, biases, fears, grudges, hopes, dreams, successes and failed attempts a client may have trouble seeing over and through as they try to develop something new in themselves. All of these things have served a valuable role in helping the person get to this point in their life, but sometimes this mass of stuff prevents being able to do something different.

It helps to imagine these internal biases as physical objects (maybe rocks, or bricks) that get carried into every situation. By creating this image, it is easier to understand how we are unable to pick up something new, because our arms are full of the past.

Suddenly it is possible to entertain the option of setting something down, before a new mindset or belief can be picked up. Take a few minutes and think about a struggle you are having in your growth and development. What is it you are trying to achieve, and what are you holding onto that is preventing it from happening? What must you let go of in order to grow? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Asking For Help – Rhoads Life Coaching

What prevents you from asking for help? I have written previously about being stuck. One of the steps of getting unstuck is asking for help. Sometimes it is the most difficult step to take. There is a significant disadvantage to not reaching out to others. Frequently we get stuck because we run out of options and don’t have another viable solution. Asking for help creates new opportunities of finding solutions we didn’t have previously.

So how often do you not ask for something you need? A conflict? A job search? A new business plan? Getting started on a New Year’s Resolution? What keeps you from reaching out beyond yourself for help? Our pride, ego, fear, and shame keep us isolated from finding new solutions.

Given the obstacles you are currently facing, when do the potential benefits of asking for help outweigh the risks of staying isolated? What do you need to do to ask for help? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Getting Out of Your Own Way – Rhoads Life Coaching

Imagine for a moment standing one a board and being asked to pick it up without moving your feet. It would be almost impossible to pick up the board without changing your position or perspective. Life can be like this. Sometimes the obstacles blocking our path to our dreams and goals are internal. Where in your life would getting out of your own way open up opportunities?

We all face obstacles in our career path, business development, teamwork, and relationships. It is very easy to explain away limiting factors, conflict, and challenges as being created from external sources. It would be naive to believe, though, that each of us doesn’t play an equal role in how we meet the obstacles in front of us. We get in our own way through negative beliefs, binary thinking, and the skewed stories we tell ourselves.

Where are you avoiding working on healing a damaged friendship? Who are the clients and customers you are not engaged with to your full potential? Who is the teammate or staff member you have built a process around in order to avoid a tough conversation? We all have examples of making choices to not change that end up blocking our own path. Frequently to our own detriment.

Where in your life are you making choices that keep you as your own obstacle? What do you need to do in order to find a creative solution of stepping off of that board in order to move forward and pick it up? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Everything Is A Choice – Rhoads Life Coaching

It might be difficult to accept the hypothesis that “everything is a choice”. When I say that I mean EVERYTHING. You choose whether to get out of bed each day. What car to drive. What clothes to wear. These choices are easy to see.

You also choose the thoughts and you attitudes take. You choose how you run your business, how you treat your clients, your employees, your family and loved ones. You choose how you treat yourself.

The choices you avoid and don’t make are also choices. Everything is a choice.

IF you are willing to accept the mindset that everything is a choice you are taking responsibility for yourself. This adds power to everything you do and who you are. Your life has the ability to change by accepting this responsibility.

What choices are you making each day? What choices are you allowing others to make for you? What choices are you avoiding? How will your life be different if you accept that everything is a choice?

Matthew Kelly wrote an essay in 1999 called The Rhythm of Life reflecting this philosophy. – www.rhoadscoaching.com

 

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Same Amount of Time As Everyone Else – Rhoads Life Coaching

Who do you look up to? What about this person is inspiring? Better yet, how does this person accomplish whatever you find inspiring? Whether you look up to a professional athlete, a business person, a family member, or a historical figure, this person has accomplished something significant with their life. How did they achieve this given that they have the same amount of time as everyone else?

Think about that for a minute. Bill Gates, Mother Teresa, Warren Buffett, Lebron James, and Dwayne Johnson all have the same 24 hours each day that you do. How are they able to get so much done day-in and day-out compared to the rest of us? While talent and resources play a role, at the end of the day it boils down to motivation and drive. How much do these people WANT to create their future compared to the rest of us? Based on their success, a LOT more!

The point becomes –

What are you doing with the 24 hours each day that you are given?

We need to be healthy by eating and sleeping, but how much time do you spend on tasks and distractions that do not reflect your values and priorities?

Have you ever quantified how you spend your time each day? Make a log! How much time do you spend in the car? On social media? Texting? Watching television or movies? Once you have quantified your ‘average’ day (make sure it adds up to 24 hours!), are there areas you can reduce to add more meaningful activities? What would your life be like if you were able to spend more time doing the meaningful things that are important to you? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Your Future Self – Rhoads Life Coaching

Because you are able to imagine a version of your future self, you are able to develop a relationship with that future you. It is reasonable to expect that you will exist at some point in the future. Whether it is 1 year, or 5 years, or 10 years, some version of you is out there in the future. If that future self pauses to look back at the current you (you do this every day looking back into the past), then for a moment you and your future self are headed toward each other in time. Eventually you will meet! Someday you will reach that future date and become the future you.

For now though, the two versions of your being can catch a glimpse of each other through time. What do they think of each other? If they were to meet, what would they say to each other? Would they be happy to satisfied with who you are and who you are becoming? What advice would they have for each other?

This is a powerful perspective! Who is that future self? Being able to imagine that vision of the future helps to guide and inspire every single decision you make each day. Are you on the right path? Creating a relationship with your future self allows you to create a vision of the future to direct your current choices!  – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life