It is sometimes the simplest ideas that are the most profound. The idea that “businesses do not exist to make money” seems simple. Not paying attention to it, however, has significant (and very complicated) consequences.
Has this thought ever crossed your mind? Did you immediately disagree when you read it? Is it a thought that lives in the back of your head without you being aware of it?
When I heard this phrase a few weeks ago, I had to laugh. Yes, it makes sense. But what do we really believe about it though? And how do we act on a daily basis?
Every single business (even the ones who are trying to increase wealth) are providing a service. To help achieve some vision of the future. If businesses only existed to make money we would not have traded goods or services prior to money existing. Businesses existed before money!
So what are the consequences of ignoring the idea that businesses do not exist to make money? We get greedy. Our behavior hardens and we start to act like machines. If there is anything you can do to bring purpose and meaning back into your professional life, start looking at our businesses, clients, and co-workers as having a purpose other than making money. – www.rhoadscoaching.com
We use the phrase “I’m Sorry” so much it ends up becoming a throwaway phrase. Almost meaningless. How often do you say it in a week? Is the meaning you’re intending conveyed with how you use it? Do you use it so much that it has no meaning at all?
The root word of sorry is ‘sore’; to physically ache or hurt. We use it to convey sympathy with someone else’s misfortune, to express regret, or describe a poor or pitiful state of something.
Do you differentiate those four definitions? Does the line between them ever blur for you? Have you ever heard someone say it meaning one definition and someone else receive it using a different definition?
If we use this phrase too much, where has it lost meaning for you? Does a hollow, “I’m sorry for your loss” land flat? Do you apologize so often the expression of regret sounds more like something pitiful? Have you ever receive an insincere apology?
My request is to separate out the different uses of “I’m Sorry” into phrases that convey the meaning you intend. Try using “I’m sad to hear of our loss”, or “Our family wants to express our condolences.” Substitute “I apologize. How can I make this better?” What other phrases are more meaningful for you?
Try substituting the definition of how you are using “I’m Sorry” instead. I’m curious to hear if you notice a difference in how you are able to communicate with others. – www.rhoadscoaching.com
Three times this week someone has mentioned having impostor syndrome! So it must be time to talk about it!
Ever have the feeling you shouldn’t be included in a group and that someone will find out? THAT’s impostor syndrome. Actually it isn’t a syndrome at all. Suzanne Imes and Pauline Rose Clance coined the term Impostor Phenomenon as it isn’t actually a diagnosable syndrome. But we all have it at some point in our lives. Some of us feel it when we are new to a group or a career, or when we don’t trust our own abilities.
Having this phenomenon creates a lot of anxiety. We all experience it in a variety of ways and for some of us we may have it about one topic while the person sitting next to us is having about something else.
There isn’t an easy fix. For some of us it goes away once we are older and have some more experience.
As with most of these internal battles we have with ourselves, it helps to name what is going on. “I fee like an impostor” said out loud relieves some of the tension.
Have some compassion for yourself and take stock of what talents, skills and experience you bring to the situation. Make a list!
Make a note for yourself that social, racial, and gender cues make this phenomenon worse. Pay attention to the scenario you are in, even you don’t feel like the impostor!
Ask for help! I’ve posted about this before. The fear of asking for help prevents so many options for us in life. And finally, take a break when you recognize that your stress is high. By pausing it allows the fear to dissipate and creates the ability to shift your perception of what is going on.
Where do you feel you are an impostor? What evidence is there to suggest this isn’t true? How different would your experience be if you believed you weren’t an impostor? That sensation isn’t helping you! – www.rhoadscoaching.com