Videos Archives - Page 16 of 22 - Rhoads Life Coaching, LLC

October 28, 2018

Know Thyself – Rhoads Life Coaching

If you remember back to your high school literature class (or maybe a world history class) the Greek Oracle of Delphi’s mantra was to ‘Know Thyself’. In the same era , Socrates admonished his critics with the idea that “an unexamined life is a life not lived”.

So why do you care? – For some of us high school literature was a long time ago and something we only wanted to survive.

The only person you will encounter in EVERY SINGLE thought, conversation, conflict, celebration, failure, etc. is yourself. There is an inherent advantage in knowing yourself well as you engage the rest of the world. So have you taken the time to get to know yourself better?

What are your values?

Your priorities?

Do you know what are you most afraid?

How are you most conflicted?

When are you most joyful? What prevents that?

What is your most proud of?

Your biggest regret?

What is your purpose?

In taking time to ‘know thyself’ better you are able to see the assets and liabilities you bring to each conversation and task you face. You have been given a task to develop yourself. Knowing what you have and where you need to grow creates meaning and purpose in your daily life.

If you are struggling to figure out who you are and what you are about (or you know someone who is in this situation), have them give me a call or send an email. I would be happy to help them discover what makes them unique and how they fit into the world. – www.rhoadscoaching.com

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

October 22, 2018

What is Your Purpose? – Rhoads Life Coaching

What is your purpose? It is an interesting question and one that is sometimes difficult to answer. In looking back at the last year of posts, almost all of the topics I have posted point in some way toward defining purpose. It is a foundational piece of who we are as individuals, what I believe about how the world works, and the bedrock of my coaching practice.

We all have a purpose!

A reason to be here.

Have you explored what your purpose is? Do you know your natural strengths and talents? Have you looked at how these fit together with your learned skills and experiences? With how these fit together with your values, priorities, and vision? All of these are markers that point toward your purpose!

You have a roll to fill in the world around you and the world needs you to fill it! How will you know if you are living your purpose? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

October 14, 2018

The Question of Why – Rhoads Life Coaching

As a small child you were given a super power. At some point early on you starting asking WHY. The question of why allowed you to develop a sense of meaning in the world. Your young brain craved the value of finding meaning!

These questions of WHY help us to understand (everything). Greater understanding adds value. The more value, the more meaning. The more meaning, the more fulfilling. So have you pointed the question of WHY at yourself lately? Why do you do the things you do? By asking this question again and again (the same way that little kid would not stop asking without a meaningful answer), we are able to remind ourselves of the purpose and meaning of the tasks of each day. There is a completely legitimate answer of why you get up before dawn to sit in traffic to earn a living for you and your family (you just need to remember)!

Drilling down into the layers of WHY we do the things we do adds meaning and purpose to the tasks of our lives. Take some time to peel back the layers and remind yourself WHY. – www.rhoadscoaching.com

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

October 7, 2018

Being Creative – Rhoads Life Coaching

Being creative is a vital part of being human. We need it. It is an important for us to make something – to create.

In her writing and research, Brene Brown talks about how painful it was for her to reconnect to her creativity. She gives the example of taking a gourd painting class and the shame and perfectionism that paralyzed her to the point of not even being able to put the brush onto the surface of the gourd. She also recounts the significant benefit to her daily life of being able to overcome that paralysis. By being creative she was adding meaning and purpose to her daily life.

There are nearly an infinite number of ways to be creative. Think of the number stores we have that sell crafting material, instruments, gardening supplies, dance lessons, drawing and painting supplies – on and on and on… There are as many ways to be creative as there are people to think of them.

What makes a task creative? There has to be an element of WANTING to do something instead of NEEDING or being required to. Also an element of getting lost in the task and ENJOYING what is being done. It might be hard work, but it is FUN too!

Where in your life are you making time for a creative outlet? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

September 30, 2018October 1, 2018

Tell Me Something Good! – Rhoads Life Coaching

I’ve written before of the need to reduce negativity. If there is ONE thing we can do to improve our lives it is to reduce the negative thoughts and words we use toward each other and ourselves. So how to do that? The simplest way to start is to practice seeing the good things that already exist around us. How? By making the request of “Tell Me Something Good!”

The guidelines are simple, find one thing in the last seven days that is positive. It could be personal or professional. It could be a small thing or some significant event. But it has to be about you (no cheating and using your kids making dean’s list two semesters ago)! Once you have found something… Tell someone!

This can be used privately for journaling and documenting the good in our lives. It can be used as an ice-breaker or to set the tone for a meeting. I have used this tool in business meetings and small group work as a practice and it works! Once the group has been trained, they come to meetings prepared to share ideas. Suddenly there is something to celebrate at every meeting! By focusing for a few minutes each day on the positive things going on around us, the negativity gets pushed back!

If you really want to stretch people’s comfort zone you can take it the next level and play Rufus & Chaka Khan’s ‘Tell Me Something Good!’ as you share! I dare you not to laugh!

Having trouble finding one good thing to start? You aren’t alone. Just like every other skill or talent, creating something different takes practice. If you don’t use it, it will disappear into the background. Counteracting negativity starts with observing the positive aspects of life that are already there. Tell Me Something Good! – www.rhoadscoaching.com

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

September 23, 2018

Understanding Our Fear – Rhoads Life Coaching

Fear is a basic human emotion. It serves a purpose and we would not be able to survive without it. What level of fear do you live with though? Is it dramatic? Is it chronic? How often do we spend any amount of time and attention understanding our fear?

Part of the mythology we have of Winston Churchill is his description of the imaginary big black dog that came to embody the sum of his fears. In learning to not run away from his fear, he imagined his fears as a giant terrifying dog that sat staring at him as he sat in his chair by the fire. The more he tried to pretend the dog wasn’t there or to chase it away the more aggressive the dog became. Only when he accepted the fear as real and valuable would the dog relax and simply be present with him. By observing the dog and trying to understand it his fears abated.

We spend tremendous amounts of time and energy avoiding or denying our fear. In order to resolve our fear it must first be understood. What are you afraid of? We all have instinctual fears (ex, snakes, spiders, large predators, falling from heights). Our DNA knows to watch out for certain physical dangers. But what are YOU personally fearful of? Being alone? Being left behind? Failing? Not being perfect? Succeeding (yes, fear of success is a real thing)? Until you are able to understand where your fear comes from it is the shadow under your bed that is imagined to be more of a threat than it actually is. Take some time and simply observe your fear. Understanding our fear is the key to reducing it. There is a benefit to letting that big black dog be present and safe in the room with you. – www.rhoadscoaching.com

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

September 16, 2018September 16, 2018

All the World’s a Stage – Rhoads Life Coaching

“All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances, And one man in his time plays many parts” (As You Like It, Act II, Scene VII).

This sentiment is one of Shakespeare’s most famous lines (and has always been one of my favorite quotes). What I didn’t realize until I sat down to write this post is that when he wrote it around 1599 it wasn’t a new idea. It wasn’t even an original idea when the ancient Greeks were writing it into their plays in the first century. There is something inherently human about seeing ourselves on the stage of some grand play. Why does that resonate with us so much?

What are the roles you play in your life (there are more than one!)?

Sometimes we are the lead in our own story and sometimes you play a supporting role in someone else’s scene. Do you get upset when you play a minor role, or do you shrink away from the spotlight being on you when it is your time to shine?

If we are all in this production together, who wrote this story? There is meaning and purpose in telling a story. What is the purpose of your story embedded in our collective story?

We are actors and actresses here on the stage. Who is this play being performed for? What do you believe?

If you are truly a performer in this play and your role can change (and it does), then the roles you play are not who you truly are (you are an actor or actress, not the hero or villain you are creating).

Finally, in the roles you have been given are you putting your heart and soul into each performance (regardless of the size of the role)? Every production needs its players to meet their full potential. Where are you phoning in a performance? Where do you need to step up you game? You have been given a role. The world needs your performance! – www.rhoadscoaching.com

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

September 16, 2018

All the World's a Stage – Rhoads Life Coaching

As You Like It, Act II, Scene VII). This sentiment is one of Shakespeare’s most famous lines (and has always been one of my favorite quotes). What I didn’t realize until I sat down to write this post is that when he wrote it around 1599 it wasn’t a new idea. It wasn’t even an original idea when the ancient Greeks were writing it into their plays in the first century. There is something inherently human about seeing ourselves on the stage of some grand play. Why does that resonate with us so much? What are the roles you play in your life (there are more than one!)? Sometimes we are the lead in our own story and sometimes you play a supporting role in someone else’s scene. Do you get upset when you play a minor role, or do you shrink away from the spotlight being on you when it is your time to shine? If we are all in this production together, who wrote this story? There is meaning and purpose in telling a story. What is the purpose of your story embedded in our collective story? We are actors and actresses here on the stage. Who is this play being performed for? What do you believe? If you are truly a performer in this play and your role can change (and it does), then the roles you play are not who you truly are (you are an actor or actress, not the hero or villain you are creating). Finally, in the roles you have been given are you putting your heart and soul into each performance (regardless of the size of the role)? Every production needs its players to meet their full potential. Where are you phoning in a performance? Where do you need to step up you game? You have been given a role. The world needs your performance! – www.rhoadscoaching.com finding meaning and purpose in daily life ]]>

September 3, 2018

Practicing Patience – Rhoads Life Coaching

What if practicing patience is just like any other skill? What if you were able to build patience just like you can build strength by lifting weights, or endurance by running?

As it turns out patience is an ability that can be developed. Each of us has things that challenge our patience. They are specific to who we are and taking the time to observe what specifically about a scenario causes us to be impatient is critical to developing more patience. Our impatience is also our own. When I lose my patience with traffic, or the person in front of me in line at the store, it is about me, not them.

If there are levels of skill involved, what is one level up from your current level of patience? What does 5% more of compassion and grace look like from you in a given situation?

All of that being said, the most important part isn’t the skill. It is the practice! What if you practiced being patient? You may be willing to practice a specific game or sport, or practice eating better, or practice communicating more effectively. What if you practiced patience? What would that look like?

What if you did more reps of practicing patience to build up your endurance and strength? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

August 26, 2018

Adaptive Management (Don’t Get Stuck In Traffic!) – Rhoads Life Coaching

Adaptive management is the mindset that course adjustments will have to be made farther down the road. It sets a clear vision and desired outcome, knowing that changes will have to be made in order to achieve the vision. In my brain, trained in environmental science and ecosystem theory, adaptive management always comes to mind as we collectively navigate back to school at the end of each summer.

It doesn’t matter whether you have children in school, our community changes with the start of classes. If you aren’t paying attention to the timing of that change (because it is an incremental one), you can be stuck in traffic on the interstate far from a school building. If I don’t leave room in my commute for school to change the traffic patterns, then I find myself stuck sitting still on the highway.

We use adaptive management all the time whether we know it or not. We modify our plans and adjust as things change. But how often do you create the opportunity for adjustments to be made in the future? Where in life do you have the expectation that once things are in motion you won’t have to change them?

A sailing crew expects to have to adjust course as the wind changes. A gardener knows that weeding and trimming will have to occur to have a healthy garden. Where in your life are you not using adaptive management? In a relationship? A job search? In working through a conflict with a co-worker or loved one? Where does adaptive management need to be built into your approach? Not having that mindset sometimes gets us stuck. – www.rhoadscoaching.com

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

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