Through the Trench, Not Around

Through The Trench - Rhoads Life Coaching
Copyright Disney Pixar, 2003

Remember Dory and Marlin in ‘Finding Nemo’? In their journey, they were given the instructions to go through the trench, not around in order to find their way.

When they arrived the trench looked scary and dangerous. Marlin was able to convince Dory to swim up over the top of the trench. This unwittingly led them directly into a swarm of poisonous jellyfish. It turns out that avoiding the tough spot was more dangerous than going through. They both were seriously injured. Their journey nearly came to an end.

Have you felt like Dory and Marlin in the last few weeks (months)? We are facing lots of very large obstacles personally and as a community. Life looks and sounds scary and dangerous in many places right now. Have you been given a signal of which way to go? Can you trust it? Are you avoiding the tough decisions?

Ironically, this image of the trench is not new. This idea of being led safely down a treacherous road is at least as old as the Old Testament. The 23rd Psalm talks about being “led through the valley of the shadow of death”. Sounds like Finding Nemo!

What is your own version of the trench? Are you taking the easy way out by not participating in the tough situations we are facing? Will you be setting yourself up for more hurt later by not taking the tougher road? How are you going to find the courage to step forward and do the tough work? It seems like now is a great time to start. – www.rhoadscoaching.com

Through the Trench - Rhoads Life Coaching Logo

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Avoiding Being the Bad Guy – Rhoads Life Coaching

How much energy do you spend on a daily basis avoiding being the bad guy? In a conflict is it more important to be seen as being on the right side of an argument instead of resolving the conflict? Our unwillingness to accept the negative aspects of who we are set us up to for failure.

If you step back and look at the overall arc of the stories we love the most (what is yours?), our heroes and heroines wrestle with the negative aspects of their personality. We identify with the character that is able to work through the unsavory shadow in their personality to find a resolution to their story. But do you act that way in your life? Most of us go WAY out of our way to avoid that shadowy part of ourselves that is willing to blow up a situation in order to skip working hard to resolve it. By avoiding looking in the mirror at that unsavory character we miss important clues into how we got into the situation to begin with. That bad guy actually holds the clues we need to resolve our conflicts. Dorothy has to face the Wicked Witch in order to move forward. Luke Skywalker has to meet Darth Vader to save his own world. Frodo has to look into his own hear and the heart of Sauron to choose something different.

So how often do you position yourself to avoid your own internal bad guy? What are the consequences? What would happen if you had a conversation with that negative character and asked for their help? Instead of avoiding being the bad guy, ask that part of yourself why it is acting that way. It has clues to help you solve your dilemma! – www.rhoadscoaching.com

Avoiding Being the Bad Guy - Rhoads Life Coaching Logo

 

finding meaning and purpose in daily life