Those That Show Up

How do you treat those that show up to work at the businesses you visit? If you are frustrated with the lack of service from industries and employees that are asked to do more with less, don’t take your frustration out on those that are making an attempt to do their jobs. Your impatience is a reflection of you, not of the person trying to help. –


finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Revisiting Allophilia

It is worth revisiting Allophilia to identify the elements of this term. Remember, Allophilia is holding in positive regard someone who is different from you. It was coined to define the opposite of prejudice.

There are four components to Allophilia – Admiration, Trust, Connection, and Engagement. Does that help paint a better picture?

Admiration – What does that mean for you? When admiring something/someone, how do you react or feel? What do you admire about others who differ from you greatly?

Trust – There are elements to, and styles of trust. What are yours? What pieces are missing from your trust model concerning people who are different?

Connection – Even with all of our technology, we live in what appears to be a fragmented and disconnected world. I truly believe we are all connected; even if we don’t understand how, or don’t like it. How do you connect to others? Understanding your connections offers insight into how to take an addition step connecting to different people.

Engagement – How does engagement different from connection? Do you pay attention to yourself with you engage with people? How do you typically act? What if the way you interacted with others was more positive? How would that change how the world looked to you?

Which pieces need the most development for you? My request is to make a practice of revisiting Allophilia as a daily practice. There is a significant benefit for you personally by enhancing this skill in your daily life.-

revisiting allophilia - Rhoads Life Coaching

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Rest (You Really Need It)

Unlike your lawnmower (or any other machine), you are a human being and it is vitally important for your health and wellbeing that you rest.

As I have posted before, our culture takes great pride in being busy and tired. We wear them like a badges of honor. The dilemma is that as human beings we are built to rest. It is a requirement.

Your lawnmower will run until it runs out of fuel or breaks down and needs maintenance. In addition to needing fuel and maintenance, humans need a recovery period too. Frequently we don’t give ourselves that opportunity. By not creating recovery time, our physical, emotional, and intellectual health is negatively impacted.

Rest is also different from vacation or recreation. Ever have to recover from taking a vacation? Don’t confuse having a fun-filled vacation with rest!

Resting has to be something idle. A time and space where our brains and emotions can wind down and cool off. Turns out we need this idle time on a frequent basis. Don’t confuse screen time with being idle, either!

So what is your relationship with rest? Are you mortal enemies? Long lost and abandoned friends? Complete strangers? Change your relationship with rest. It might take some practice, but pay attention to how your body reacts to having some time to recover. –

rest - Rhoads Life Coaching

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

The Befuddled Coachman Podcast – Why I Coach – S02 E21

why i coach - The Befuddled Coachman Podcast

Introspective Topics in Under Five Minutes!

One of the questions I haven’t answered is ‘Why I Coach’. It is humbling to watch an individual connect the dots and reach up to a higher level of development and growth!

Hosted by Rhoads Life Coaching

why i coach - The Befuddled Coachman

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

The Befuddled Coachman Podcast – What IS Coaching? – S02 E20

what is coaching - The Befuddled Coachman Podcast

Introspective Topics in Under Five Minutes!

So what IS coaching? Coaching is different from therapy, consulting and advising. Why do you need a coach?

Hosted by Rhoads Life Coaching

what is coaching - The Befuddled Coachman

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Acedia (Drifting Into Not Caring) – Rhoads Life Coaching

The ancient Greeks had a term for the apathy of sustained isolation. Acedia is the sense of drifting into not caring. Knowing it is happening is the key to getting out.

Remember the poppy field that Dorothy and her friends wander into in the Wizard of Oz? Or the dwarves getting lost in the forest of Mirkwood in the Hobbit? We sometimes find ourselves wandering through a monotonous dreary stretch of life that creates an apathy that almost puts us to sleep.

I have been battling this myself for the last few weeks and have coaching clients who are describing the same thing. Virtual hang out with friends aren’t as novel as they were 5 months ago. I’ve watch ALL of Netflix and am almost finished with Prime. Who cares, right?

If the ancient Greeks had a term for it, it can’t be something new to the human experience. In my brain, the fact this malaise isn’t new is helpful. Someone has been here before. How did they get out?

For the Greeks they found help in reconnecting. When they found themselves experiencing acedia they would double down and reconnect with those they cared about. The relationships and sticking together was they way through.

The first step to reducing this apathy and anxiety is to recognize that it is there! The second step is to reconnect. Who have you lost contact with in the last few months? Who do you need to reach out to? Now that you have completed step one, who do you need to call? –

Acedia - Rhoads Life Coaching Logo

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Our Service to Others – Rhoads Life Coaching, LLC

We hold up as heroes those who make it their career or calling to serve others. Part of our own development is to find our own way to find purpose and meaning the service to others.

Who are the everyday heroes you hold in high regard? Our military service members? Our law enforcement officers? The medical community? Teachers? Those stocking the shelves at the store?

We have been doing a lot of that lately. Lifting those up who stand at the front line of our communities and serve us unselfishly. Putting the needs of others first is a trait we value, all the way down to our philosophy and religions.

What if these heroes weren’t just meant to be public servants, but also role models to emulate? How are you developing the service part of yourself? What would it look like to put the needs of those around you above your own? As it turns out, the meaning and purpose we find in the world comes from that connection of helping each other.

What prevents you from developing your service to others? It could be as simple as feeling patriotic in wearing a mask in public. Not for your own safety, but the safety of those around you. Maybe you could be just like our heroes. What do you have to lose? –

Service to Others - Rhoads Life Coaching Logo

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Everything Needs A Context – Rhoads Life Coaching

It is difficult to overstate the idea that everything needs a context. It is impossible to accurately create decisions without taking the context of a situation into account.

Do you remember the chemistry or physics teacher in high school that taught the lesson that numbers are meaningless without units? The speed of an object in miles per hour versus kilometers per second makes a big difference! Context matters!

A few months ago walking into a bank with a mask on would have caused panic. Now we might be upset if someone didn’t wear a mask into the bank. The context has changed!

What happens if we take something out of context, or read the wrong story into a scenario? We come to the wrong conclusion! The menacingly misnamed “murder wasps” have arrived in the Pacific northwest for the first time. If we read the wrong frame of reference, we create a story where thousands of people are a risk of being killed by an aggressive insect. If we leave the context out, we miss the fact that our threatened honey bee populations are now MORE at risk, which has significant impacts to the way we create our food.

Where in your life do you forget to put things in correct setting? In a conflict with someone? When making decisions about budgeting income? When setting goals for yourself? Every aspect of our lives is impacted by all the other areas.

If we leave the context out of how we talk to each other or how we make decisions, we limit our ability to make better choices. Everything needs a context! –

Everything Needs A Context - Rhoads Life Coaching Logo

finding meaning and purpose in daily life