Your Internal Grinch

Don’t let your Internal Grinch steal the joy you have during this season!

I’ve posted previously about all the different roles we play in our daily lives. It is one of the foundational pieces of my coaching practice that each of us is a multi-faceted, dynamic being. We are complicated! Given all of that complexity, consider for a minute one piece of who you are includes Dr. Seuss’ Grinch, sitting atop the mountain alone and grumpy.

Part of Dr. Seuss’ genius was his ability to write about our internal world, just as accurately as the external world. How The Grinch Stole Christmas is about our own internal experiences. How do we know? Because if you pay enough attention to yourself you can start to see parts that conflict with your experience of the holidays.

Do you dread holiday parties? Worried the present you got isn’t good enough? Trying to keep up with the neighbor’s light display? Stressed about connecting with family you have been avoiding? Hurried to finish shopping? Ready to humbug the whole month and just stay locked away in your cave? How long is the line? Are you a wrapping paper perfectionist? Do you stress about spending too much money?

All of these (and MANY other variations) are versions of your internal Grinch stealing joy from the season!

If the Grinch has to learn to accept the season for what it is, what parts of you are missing the meaning and purpose you already have for this time of year? Where does your Grinch dress up like Santa and steal the joy of others?

My request is to pay attention to yourself. Watch out for your Internal Grinch. What does your internal world need to include the Grinch?

Regardless of your tradition, beliefs, and faith, may the next few weeks be filled with peace and joy and hope. Happy Holidays! – www.rhoadscoaching.com

internal grinch - Rhoads Life Coaching

finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Different Kinds of Tired

I’ve posted previously about how we have different internal centers (intellectual, emotional, physical). Because these centers each function in unique ways we can also have different kinds of tired.

How well do you observe fatigue in each center? Remember being intellectually exhausted after finals in high school? Remember being emotionally worn out from fear or sadness? How are those two things different than being physically tired? What if two of the centers are tired, but not three? Could you tell the difference?

Because these centers fatigue differently, they also rest differently. Using your go-to resting method may only refuel you physically, but not emotionally or intellectually. If you are able to sort out the different kinds of tired, how would you best rest each center?

The answers may be unique you. The practice though is we all have these different engines that run inside of us. They are there for different reasons and use different fuels to recharge in different ways. Being able to recognize the differences creates the opportunity to rest those centers as needed. – www.rhoadscoaching.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Our Culture of Comparison – Rhoads Life Coaching

We swim in a culture of comparison. It is so much a part of who we are we don’t even know we are doing it. It is like the air we breath. In order to know where we are in terms of our identity and success, we automatically compare ourselves to those around us. It is how we calibrate.

This comparison is a trap. Either we compare ourselves to those who are less than us in order to feel better. Or we compare ourselves to our idealized version of whatever it is we are trying to measure. Note that I didn’t say, compare ourselves to those better than us. Comparison can be healthy in terms of competition, but rarely do we ever compare ourselves to someone at our own level where it is possible to complete. We compare ourselves to the imagined best. And we end up being “never enough”.

So where do you compare yourself to others? It might be easier to list where you don’t compare. Is it the better job? Or size of house? The marriage/relationship? Their hair? Where they went to school? The team they root for?

The trap in our comparison culture is that it spirals out of control into judgement. ANYTHING you can do to reduce comparison to others is an automatic decrease in stress, envy, jealousy, and conflict. Where is the easiest place for your to start? – www.rhoadscoaching.thinkific.com

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finding meaning and purpose in daily life

Knowing vs. Understanding – Rhoads Life Coaching

Do you keep track of how to define knowing vs. understanding? When we teach young children to brush their teeth, we begin by teaching them HOW to brush. It takes a while to learn to know how to brush! The understanding of WHY to brush their teeth is different. It isn’t a requirement to understand why brushing is important in order to complete the task. As they get older (and probably after a couple of cavities) the understanding of why to brush enables their brushing to develop to a higher level of skill and effectiveness.

We have all run into the fast food server, or the unmotivated co-worker, who clearly knows how to do their job, but does not have a developed understanding of why their role is important to the business, community, or even themselves. In order to grow personally and professionally, it helps to identify the areas where knowing must change into understanding. This can apply to any aspect of life and creates a sense of purpose and meaning in our daily tasks.

Where does this happen for you? What aspects of your life are you going through the motions because you know how to do something, but have not paid attention to or developed your understanding of why. A skill or task at work? How to navigate a conflict with a family member? Why you have such a difficult time overcoming a personal obstacle? Where is there an opportunity to develop your knowing vs. understanding? – www.rhoadscoaching.com

Knowing vs Understanding - Rhoads Life Coaching

finding meaning and purpose in daily life